Monday, September 24, 2018

I'M IN NYC

2013, October
On Katharine Hepburn's Block

Sitting in "Nations Cafe" on 49th and 1st. I asked if this has always been a restaurant and was told since 1962, thought it used to be smaller. (A customer, a woman who lives across 1st remembered it opening then.)

On the same side towards 2nd is Katharine Hepburn's Turtle Bay brownstone she purchased in 1937 for $27,500.00. I know this because I'm re-reading her autobiography ME given to me by my grandmother for my 25th birthday, inscribed "To Teri with Love, Nana, October 4, 1991." I have always been attracted to who Katharine Hepburn was. A good actress, yes, but more than being a fan of her work I think I'm a fan of how she lived and how that translated into the roles she played. I've read so many biographies about her and one constant is her strong sense of who she was and where she came from without question. Without question.

Tour buses keep passing by and I wonder if the Hepburn residence is a POI.

Katharine Hepburn didn't go to therapy. I think she got it out on stage and in front of the camera. I do that. Cathartic moments through the work. (Was Katharine Hepburn here at Nations Cafe?) Her driver, Charles Newhill - "Mayor" of her block - was he? Am I walking in her steps?

My grandfather, Elmer Clark, lived and worked in Manhattan on Wall Street in the '20's. Pre-dated Katharine Hepburn a bit. They may have crossed paths. When she first arrived and was going on castings. She drove then. Wrote in ME that one could in NYC back then. It was a different time. Oh, and the $27K she bought 244 East 49th with? There's a 2010 Internet listing to lease the place for $27K a month. Just about the same price Katharine Hepburn bought the apartment for in 1937 will by 1 month, 4 weeks rent, today. (That would be about what one 13-week contract recording about 18 audio books - 180 hours of recorded material - would buy me - 1 month in Katharine Hepburn's Turtle Bay apartment.)

I'm seeing LION KING again in 1 hour and 10 minutes. Taking Molly who lets me stay with her in Queens when I visit. (I think I may be outgrowing these visits...really? Why do I think that?) LION KING is a very God-experience for me. I don't see much theatre anymore since moving to Ohio. I'd rather spend my money seeing the LION KING again and again than on something I most likely find mediocre.

LATER
On way into city - will go to Benetton and see agent.

What do I know or believe after 4 days in NYC? What is true or truer for me?
  • It's not becoming to discuss money. 
  • It's not becoming to criticize or become negative. 
  • I would definitely speed up my aging process if I lived here. 
  • I miss acting on the stage. 
  • I miss acting Shakespeare. Seeing Shakespeare. I'm good at it. 
  • It's good to miss Sam and for Sam to miss me. Sam gets along with his Dad just fine without me.
  • It's important to go away for me. I feel more like me. 
  • I'm thankful for my home. I have so many thanks. I'm blessed. 
  • I need to work. I need to perform. 
  • I don't believe actors in bad productions aren't trying their best (I blame the director.) Romeo and Juliet on Broadway is the director's fault. 
  • I can have hopes, wishes and dreams, but I can't chase them. (Let go, let God.) 
  • One way God reaches people is through me when I'm performing (especially on stage.) 
  • I am very, very open, very compassionate. Very aware. 
  • Despite daily pounding on my emotions, my true self prevails. 
  • I am stronger than my enemies. 
  • I'm not getting older, I'm outgrowing. Growing out. 
  • I don't want to live in NYC (at least not on a permanent basis.) 
  • People are on the whole good. 
9/24/18 tlc



Monday, September 3, 2018

ACTRESS 25 CHICAGO


”I accept the gift of light shining on my path revealing the way to my highest good.”

Mom to Me, 9/27/1992


Chicago

5/19/92

I haven’t been in a show for a month except “Cannibals” (Cannibal Cheerleaders on Crack) those two Saturdays.  

Schiffra didn’t cast me. I think David Zak hates me.  

Had a callback for Pepto Bismal at Leo Burnetts - the 4th time for this now - shit!

All my pix were gone at Emilia’s - Nick was nice - was told that the only way agents will meet you from Harrisse (Davidson agency) is to see a show of yours.

Rorie was nicer to me at NTN (National Talent Network agency) AND on the train that one day.

My scene partner is great - he’s worked with Shakespeare Rep. (now Chicago Shakespeare Theatre) and Bob is his roommate. I think Bob likes me. The class is okay so far. I’m dying to read my scene already.  

Bob is Bob Scoggin, veteran actor at Shakespeare Repertory and teacher of my Shakespeare Folio Technique Scene class.  

Ego boost at work today. Bill R. said I was the “audition queen” (“too bad you never get cast in anything” in jest.) At least someone notices.

Shakespeare Rep. has to call me in for Lear or at least their matinee kids series.

I bought a new address book for business names only - I’m important now.





Thursday, August 30, 2018

NEW YORK HEADSHOTS SHOOT

From May 31, 2018

Thursday

Headshots shoot with Doug Gorenstein (3rd time.) Sarah did hair and make-up. Sam along.

1st time with Doug in Michigan - he came over and shot actors. Simple. Good. About 10 years ago.

Then 4 1/2 years ago - January in NYC - garment district. Now same building, different studio.

Doug from Michigan - talked hockey with Sam. Funny how we can all relate some how.

He was set photographer on Celebrity Apprentice - yes, our current Prez - then and now, the same.

Walked after back to hotel. Same as last year - Marriott Fairfield, CPW.

Jenny (step-bonus-daughter) came and we ordered pizza and salad to room.

Oh, saw Sponge Bob the Musical matinee. Sam's school band teacher knows the conductor/musical director.

Friday

Took Sam to Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island and dinner with cousin Zach and Jenni. Found ancestor's name in computer database.

Saturday

At Jenni and Dan's (husband/Long Island.) I could live in New York. 1 bedroom, upper west side. I could do that. There's something about walking everywhere, looking and making beauty in smaller moments.

And the culture.

And the opportunities.

I really could BE here. Yes.

From Set Tuesday (the I See You Film)

Greg Williams and I both know Donna Biscoe. He's been her husband on about 4 films. And, Chicago. He and Bruce A. Young were in Troilus and Cressida - Shakespeare Rep's (now Chicago Shakespeare Theatre) 1st play - my stage combat class in college (Roosevelt University) went to see Bruce (our teacher) in it. Greg was on stage at them all - Goodman, Northlight, Wisdom Bridge - all the Equity houses where I dreamed of working.

All I wanted then was to be a union working actor - like the Mockus's (Tony Mockus, Sr. and Jr.) - Petrea Burchard (Sandel) - Paula Scrafano and John Reeger - Barbara Robertson - Bruce.

Greg told a great story about John Reeger.  He stutters. Call his house and he puts his kids on - but NEVER, not once saw him miss a word on stage!

Maybe if I'd set my sights higher then - want to be a Star - I would have settled around Chicago and the Equity theatre sooner. Or NYC. Instead of living immediately with boyfriends and fiancees - married - waiting tables.

I wasn't selfish enough. Confident enough. Secure in my sense of self and being alone. ("And you give yourself away. And you give yourself away. And you give, and you give, and you give..." - U2, With or Without You.)

Take the money and run.

Sense of self.

Let it breathe. Let it be. "If you build it they will come."

Casting from Instagram accounts now - Followers.

I want to build a different account.

I want to shopping. Trainers. Pink jeans. Summer pull-on sweater. For Sam, jacket.

Audiobook bodice ripper - Sweet Tempest - and maybe booked Nationwide CAT II VO's, auditioned for 2 today - we flew out and did 3rd Thursday on Garage Band (didn't book.)

Thanks to Director (offer to help promote film locally or will fly out.) Go through 2nd AD - text (or agent/website.)

2 books last week. Whisper Me This and Hollywood Heir. More steamy romances from Brilliance (Audio.)

Tuesday

Flight home from NY. 235 headshot images to narrow down.

Sam 1st baseball game tonight.

Following Week

Watched taped Tony's this morning and saw Jeff and Kathleen (Daniels) in audience. I'll forever get excite seeing people I know on screen!

tcl
8/30/18

Wednesday, August 29, 2018

I WAS ON A FILM SET YESTERDAY

From May 30th, 2018

I was on a film set yesterday. I SEE YOU. Thriller. Cleveland.

I'm Mrs. Braun. 2 scenes.

Drove up night before and stayed at Marriott Courtyard by Cleveland Clinic. 

Up at 4:30 A.M. Basecamp 5:30 A.M.

2nd AD, "Are you Teri?"

Key 2nd AD showed me trailer - "Honey Wagon" like first Indie (I was on) Ocean of Pearls - or Mooz-lum - attached to row of trailers with toilettes in between. Small with paper thin partitions - toilet, sink inside operated by foot pedal.

My make-up stylist and my hair said they were built in the '70's. That would explain the ashtray off my sink.

There was a narrow window with aluminum blinds with the opener wand broken off and a dead spider hanging curled from a middle slat, but a view of the Cuyahoga Channel (saw 2 skull boats going by.)

Hair/make-up had 3 stations. All were semi-cool air conditioned - anything better than the 90 plus outside though. 

And a cushion to lie flat on.

So, despite my feeling of weirdness taking my morning dump in my closet size room and then sitting with it sans fan (and hearing the same from the trailer next to me) I was in heaven with my own private space.

In between scenes I took my undies off and hung them on a wall hook to air out (so hot they were wet - nice image.) So, private.

Despite the script definition for my character having short, close-cropped hair (I was hoping for a wig cap) hardly anything was done to my hair. Little make-up. Looked like me, really. Just like the other films. Like Jack Reacher - had hotel concierge snap iPhone pic on 2nd AD request. Hair told me, "Director doesn't want anything different." Some product run through - a comb. I think it's the color for the frame - either works or doesn't. Like all things.

Wardrobe designer, lovely, drove up week before and she fitted several options on me. Settled on jean skirt with kind of long-sleeve cotton henley tucked in and long sleeveless cardigan. Slip on mules. If it weren't Florida in the summer weather out it would have felt much better on.

Brought Sam up with me to fitting. Finished school 5/18. After, we went to beach. We were in Lakewood where set was house on water (Lake Erie) 3 weeks. Went to find beach and had 2 no-go's before settling on Metropark Huntington Beach (1st was private, 2nd never found.) GPS doesn't trell you public or private on nearby searches, or where entrance is when you've passed it.

Steps only down to the water - 2 tiers - and we settled down (shade - lovely) to have Sam want to walk to other end. We did, settled. Music playing, so up again to midway between stops 1 and 2 and settled. Sam off on cement breakers. Me eyes closed on back on towels. Shade. Breeze. Waves lapping. Bliss.

Joined Sam and eventually we skimmed stones - lots of flat ones - like my dad showed me - then stood on shore and tossed baseball (brought gloves.) Sam kept us out there a while despite my few attempts to quit (he can make a game of anything and did extending our play changing what a throw back and forth's count was from back and forth ='s 1, to 4 rounds =1, 6=1, etc. Very fun day. He went back to rocks and I to towels.

I noticed (as I did when we sat down) a lady with stroller and lots of beach toys talking to her children trying patiently to get older daughter to come in and go. Kids were in swim shirts and she a very cool denim suit cover and sunglasses, and I thought they looked like they probably lived around the expensive area, but their accents said otherwise - British. I thought about my British director I'd met a few weeks back at the callback. Wondered if... sure, because in big cities like Cleveland no one else could possibly have a foreign accent!

I watched "Mum" take 2 loads of toys and a bag up all the stairs and tell her son and daughter she'd be back (and again to get out of the water - 2 more families they'd been playing with and me their with eyes on them) and thought about the huge pram and going up the stairs and decided I'd offer help as SO many had done for me over the years traveling (Spain, airports) alone while (my husband) rode his bike.

Mum accepted my help when she came back and I asked, "Where from?"

"England." I smiled and sort of looked at her like, "Yes, obviously," and she said that some people thought she was from Australia, which I guess is like those in Spain who thought I was British, having no discernment for the accent. 

She said, "London," and that her husband was working there 2 months. 

"You're not with production, are you?"

"Yes."

"I'm playing Mrs. Braun, I'm Teri."

"You're kidding. I'm the director's wife."

I took the bottom of the pram as we went up.  She said, "I don't want you take all the weight."

"It's fine." (It was.)

On set I saw the director and said, "I met your wife."

"Yes, she said you'd rescued her." I always think it's a small world (Disney song) getting smaller (me.)

I was given entire script to read (rare)_ and like Jack Reacher it read like a really great fiction book. Much more insight into my character.

Talking with Director and telling him about reading it he (very surprised sounding) asked, "You mean you didn't read it before the callback?"

"No. I only got it after I was cast." (Standard for me.)

I wonder if this was a bit of a wonder for him - "How could she have acted that way without reading the script?!?"

Right after showing up to base (camp) I met actor playing Mr. Braun (I keep thinking of Hitler's girlfriend Eva Braun - am I only one?) Gave big hug - everyone is so nice. He is reason I have photos - he took with his phone - us (selfie) in shuttle - us and Director after wrap at last location - we had all melted but somehow looked refreshed - and us plus Greg Alan Williams and Jon Tenney (leads.)

1st set up was downtown - base camp at Flat Iron district - on street The Deer Hunter film was shot - on porch of "dilapidated middle class house" and supposedly next to house Robert DeNiro lived in during Deer Hunter. Owner (never saw) was home. I shot in front doorway holding open screened storm door so I got to see behind me the entry hallway and partial view of room behind. Paneled wall on left. Old wooden changing table with peeling Winnie the Pooh wallpaper tacked on to half (thought of Sam's nursery in Dexter, MI house and used the emotions nicely for 1st take.) They always shoot stars 1st and though I get to practice this way all the freshness also dissipates slowly before my takes on camera and thus lies 1 challenge of a Day Player.) Some kind of safe maybe along paneled wall next to Pooh table. Across very dusty shelving unit with wedding photo. Miscellaneous figurines. Against back wall to right of entrance to room lots of fishing poles. A shelf along wall in room with cat carrier on it. Dim lighting.

Our brilliant and grounding 1st AD, "Very allergic to cats," and could smell the "cat smell." (Not me - guess after living with them 31 years I'm numb.)

The porch could only have "6" people on a time - made me wonder when 6 and 2 cameras - A and B - were on porch for my scene - whole thing on slant - street on huge slope - very like Pittsburgh or Charleston, W. V. Porch overhang with dark green peeling paint chips hanging from it. Rusted iron porch rails. Rusted dilapidated porch glider. Perfect for scene. Felt empathy for Owner - being judged.

"Told inside is horrible - unlivable and not to use bathroom," et. al. Port-a-potty which another said would "never use" hadn't "landed" and "still hadn't landed" after hour or more and inside toilet was offered. I was going to drop trow behind shed in community garden until neighborhood gardeners appeared, and then thankfully during turnaround went to base camp with Jon who had to go.

Told him my shooting with film students in Texas story - gorgeous location - early morning - where's bathroom? Nearest 1/2 hour away. We'll be here all day taking me back and forth. So had students - females of course - hold blanket up to fence while I went. #1 thankfully.

Schedule had me wrapped before lunch. Ended up staying. Some open area with tents, tables and chairs - lovely really (some, "We're eating OUTSIDE?!?" because of heat really and what we're wearing.) Good food.

Shuttled back to base for touch-ups us in scene (minus Greg, he went earlier) and with kids and dad's - 2 boys whose IMDB credits read like seasoned veterans, and Jeremy (my son.) We were midway through his (and our last) scene our back before lunch. His make-up - a 3 hour job - a real treat to see up close - can't wait to see on screen. Lovely actor.

Note: End of entry - probably had to go to set. Rest of day filled with more of same - despite scorching temperatures even for Ohio humidity in late May, cast and crew did exceptional working through and supporting each other, and at one point a crew member gave one of the leads an industrial sized looking personal hand-held fan. That fan ended up being held by every one of us actors at some point, or one of the actors holding the fan to blow on another one in between takes. We were so comfortable with each other towards the end of the shoot I'd made a comment about blowing the air up my skirt save for it becoming some kind of a hashtag activist movement on social media and another actor had said he'd thought the same.  (I shared my Nana's phrase, "Whatever blows your skirt up," for 'whatever you want' and no one had ever heard it and laughed.) I See You is set for release in 2019.

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

TO LONDON

(This is from a handwritten journal September 15, 2016.)

THURSDAY

8-something U.K. time - landing London Heathrow.

Surprisingly, I'm not braindead.

Yesterday: Banana, 1/2 waffle, tangerine, grapes, grapes (not a typo -I'd written it twice) apple, cheese stick, granola.  Lots water. 10:30 meal plane - pasta/cheese, fruit, roll, salad and breakfast 2:30/7:30, yogurt, water, fruiT.

Laxative, vitamins, aspirin (2 muscle relaxers yesterday) oh, and glass wine.

Slept not great. Curled on seats. Uncomfortable on joints.

Charlotte Rampling genius 45 YEARS.

AFTERNOON

Menopause and London during a heatwave go together about as well as peanut butter and thumbtacks.

FRIDAY

(Pre-notes on getting around before leaving flat.)

Tower Pier (overhead Shoreditch to DLR Shadweel to Tower Hill to Tower Pier. Ferry to Westminster and Big Ben, Parliament, Victoria Embankment, cross Bridge Street (left to) entrance on Abdington Street, cross to Westminster Abbey.

12:30 Mass.

Walking tour from Big Ben/Parliament to Trafalgar Square:

Start Westminster Bridge - End Trafalgar Square:

National Galleries
National Portrait Gallery
Tea at National Gallery
Embankment Pier ferry back or Leicester Square Station
Cranborn and Charing, cross road at Leicester Square, north from National Gallery up Charing Cross Road OR Embankment Pier from Trafalgar square, Northumberland to Thames River and Victoria Embankment, turn left (pass tube station and walk east.)

Stumbled upon Horse Guard Inspection at Buckingham Palace. Swans and geese at St. James Park.  Lovely couple from Connecticut at Churchill War Rooms. 13 year-old brown labrador named Ben along White Hall. Cheerful guards posing with tourists at #10 Downing. DJ spinning at Trafalgar Square before tea at National Gallery. Good and damp day.

LATER

Churchill was a redhead. Passionate and a performer. A painter and writer. A romantic ("Clemmie") and lover of dogs. Bull dog - my fave. I think if he were born a woman he'd have gone into acting, like me. The war rooms were excellent.

SATURDAY
Only other notes for rest of week are more transportation notes and the following:

SUNDAY
Tour w/ Jenni (my step-daughter, whom I was staying with in a Shoreditch flat while she was on business.)

Golden Tours UK (use Viator going forward - guess I wasn't impressed.)

Bath, Jane Austen, Stonehenge.

tcl
8/28/18 early evening